2021 was a year full of personal challenges and growth and I’m not gonna lie, it was a tough one. I was really forced to think about myself and what I want, to not shy away from hard conversations or insecurities. But when I look through these photos and I see the joy, adventure and discovery that came along with it, it makes it all worth it. I spent the better part of this year thinking I would be in my van by summer, on the road with nothing but Rigby, nature and the undetermined. Yet the van, didn’t want to follow my timeline, to no one’s surprise but my own. It caused me to refocus, to redirect what I wanted next and where I wanted to go. Luckily I was in therapy at the time and my therapist reminded me that even though the van wasn’t done I could still explore and get out there as I had planned. I could take this unexpected opportunity to focus on cities and places I wouldn’t necessarily go in the van. So in the span of a couple of days I planned a 2 month long road trip, going to cities I either knew people in or cities that I could see myself living in. Those 2 months with just Rigby and I in the mini cooper were challenging and lonely at times but incredibly rewarding. It felt like the cumulation and celebration of a years worth of work and self reflection. I took space to think and cry in sorrow and joy and really feel and absorb myself in beautiful unknown places. To watch sunrises and hike up mountains, to laugh with new and old friends, eat incredible food, and fall in love with the beauty of the US, especially in Colorado. So much so that I applied to an apartment in Denver on a whim asking for a sign that this was the right next step. And I got it.
It was incredibly hard to think about leaving my family and the community I had built in Cincinnati. Moving away from people that have supported me in some trying years and been there for hard conversations and for so much stinking laughter. Those people are the reason I feel like I can do the scary things and put myself out there and be inexplicably myself. They are the reason I am who I am. It is because of them that I feel like I can move and go after whatever it is I am chasing. The past 2 years in Cincinnati have reminded me of who I am and who I hope to be as a person and friend and that I am worth friendship and love. I allowed myself to really build those connections and ground myself in those spaces and I can’t even imagine my life if I hadn’t lost my job and moved home 2 years ago. It has been so incredibly full because of those people and that space.
While it is incredibly scary to be in a new place again, things feel aligned in Denver and this time it feels different. It feels right. I myself was able to make the decision on my own to move here, it wasn’t based on a job or something unexpected. It was because I took the time to really think and I have a job that allows me to live where I want to. I’m incredibly excited to be close to the mountains again, I have craved being wild and free and close to nature. I know that if I keep putting myself out there and do things I love I will make a community here and really find a home and that I have my people at home cheering for me and hopefully coming to visit!!!
In 2022, I am looking forward to giving myself space to keep figuring out this crazy, wild, big thing we call life. To being kind to myself and listening to what my mind, body and soul needs. To snuggling my pupper extra tight, god I love that dog so much. To getting outdoors and exploring new areas. To moving more; to music, at yoga, on my bike, on the trail, in any way I can. To continuing to foster a community. To reading more, writing more, and telling the people I care about, how much I care about them more. To diving deeper into my spirituality and letting my intuition guide me. To not being afraid to communicate and really say what I am thinking. To continuing to foster love for myself and others, because we all deserve it. To being creative and rediscovering those practices that make me the happiest. To breathing deeper and being more free to whatever may come my way. Cheers to the next year and hopefully feeling surprised as hell at the end of it.
Here are some of my favorite snaps from 2021 (musings continued after):
1 doggo, 1 epic road-trip, 50 pints of ice-cream, 1 move home, 20 sunrises, 1 mechanically sound VW van (yay, off to body next!), at least 30 pizzas, 1 tattoo, 30 incredible hikes, 10 good sad cries, 11 good happy cries, 1 new apartment, 1000s of miles in the car, 50 sessions of therapy, 100s of hours of Spotify, 87 Oat milk lattes, 50 dog parks, 5 mountain lakes swims, and here we are, the end of one of the toughest years yet. Cheers to this next year being full of as much growth as 2021.
xx Kait